WTF, Japan Part 7

Well, I'm packed, my room is barren once again like a hospital suite, and I am ready (?) to head out of Japan tomorrow for the first time in 8 months.

It doesn't really help that I got a gorgeous new flatscreen and new firm mattress two days ago. Seriously, E-Village, couldn't you have just waited till we were all gone and not teased us.

And furthermore, wouldn't that have been easier for you guys to do it when E-Village is at half-capacity instead of full? And people moving out? WTF?

Yeah... I think it might be another one of those posts. I mean, we needed one more before I left Japan, right?

I went to the Japanese bank today to close out my account, and you'd be amazed at how smoothly it went. I walked into a bank in a foreign country, they spoke English, they printed out traveller's checks in US Dollars, gave me my Japanese yen balance, set up a wire transfer to a US Bank, and then closed all my accounts.

In 45 minutes.

With a smile and a bow.

Yet, when I attempt to do a routine online transfer with my US Bank, I'm forced to wait 24 hours while the system never resets itself, call the 1-800 number 4 times, navigate those damn automated menus, speak to 3 different people, discover I'm being charged ridiculous inactive fees although I've explained my current situation REPEATEDLY, get the 3 dollar fee to do the transfer on the phone waived only to find out my account is dormant and frozen, and that I must go into a branch in person to sort this all out.

While I'm in Japan and all I wanna do is transfer MY money that I'm apparently paying them 15 dollars a month to hold hostage.

WTF, Compass Bank, WTF?

And furthermore, when I asked for the address to which I should send my ATM receipts after I return home in a few weeks, I was told that my "Free Checking Account" no longer held that privilege, and in the 3 months the nice hick lady had been with the company, "nobody ever had that privilege with a free checking account".

Exactly, Arkansas-backwoods-no-brain-barbie. I've been with this bank for 5 years, which apparently means I know more about its operations than its employees! The whole reason I signed up for the account in the first place was its ATM rebate fees. And I certainly never got a notification that that service was ending.

Or that I was being charged to let them keep my money and invest it poorly.

Or that they can hold my money hostage and make me appear in person when I've been LIVING OUT OF THE COUNTRY for 8 months.

Seriously, What the fudge?

But I'll survive, even if I'm flying to Taiwan tomorrow with no real idea of what I'll find.

I just gotta keep on trucking and let the wind tell me where I'm going.